Big hug

I sat on the edge of his bed looking at him and contemplating his features. His eyes were gently closed; the blanket was covering his body, shoulders and chin. He was resting his cheek on his right hand. He woke up but still closing his eyes pretending to be a sleep; his eyes were tightened, his breathing wasn't relaxed. I call his name and he smiles, opens his eyes and say "Good morning sweet sister", "Good morning little dolphin" I say. He opens his arms for me; I bend forward for him to hug me. He used to call me mama but started to call me by my name later on; while I am nineteen years older than him, I treat him as a son. What mostly hurts is him telling me that I am not his mum. It makes me want to cry; how childish I am, I know. But I can't handle that feeling in a wiser way. Once my mum travelled to her family for a week; I was a student in University at that time, and he was 8 months old; so I had to be a full time mummy. I skipped all classes for the whole week and stayed at home taking care of him. It was my favourite week. Since he was 4 he started to give me a greeting card that he did in every Valentines Day; this year at February 14 I went home after work expecting to find a card on my bed; but it was on my mother's bed instead. I 'm not his mum, I’ve never been. He hugs me tight, and says "Do you want a bigger hug" "No thank you; that was big enough" I say.